Once a rat has made up its mind to groom you, there's no escaping it

The sniff test

Be sure to smell eggnog to check for spoilage before partaking.

Damn.

The Christmas Jell-O mold never turns out right.

Basketball too?!!

Turns out, not only did the M&M leave me high and dry for the Panthers meetup, they also took in a game of Rat Basketball. Without me. Knowing how I feel about rodents! At least they were kind enough to take some video footage.

I give you .... Pepper Jack & Nacho, street style:

Not your regular day at the park

I can't figure out what the squirrel on the left is doing. His presence seems superfluous. An armed referee, perhaps?

Squirrel foils police, frames teens for Cheetos theft

A crafty squirrel had a near miss with the law after breaking into a vending machine in Minnesota, an anonymous source told Henry's Travels. The squirrel managed to throw police off the scent by leaving a trail of powdery orange crumbs that ended at the doorstep of a 19-year-old boy's apartment. The Twin Cities teen and two friends were arrested and charged with burglary and damage to property. The squirrel then emerged from the bushes and fled to a nearby park, where he began working on his Cheetos mustache.

Photo credit.

World Rat-Firefighter Day

That's it, I'm firing my secretary. He was supposed to remind me that April 4 was World Rat Day. I beg your pardon, dear readers. Dare I say there's still a whiff of the holiday in the air? Join me as I pay photographic tribute to these brave, firefighting rats. (The one under the truck is not cowering—he's just inspecting the chassis. Aye, by my whiskers! I do believe there's a radiator leak).

Hip-hip, hur-rat!

I egg your pardon

"Henry, I was just catching up on your blog from last week, and I see that you did not post the photo of Buster in his Easter basket in your Sunday blog, per my request," says She-Who-Need-Not-Be-Named.

Gulp, says I.

"Do you KNOW who pays the Internet bill around here?" says SWNNBN.

Why don't I just wait until next Easter?

"You are blogging on borrowed time."

I see your point.

Change your wipers! Wake up the rodent!

Most of you are probably thinking today is Groundhog Day. You're only partly right. It's also National Change Your Windshield Wipers Day. Leave it to the National Safety Council to barge in and ruin a perfectly good, unsafe holiday. Because the only thing more dangerous than driving with a dirty windshield is waking a 10-pound rodent with 4-inch teeth.

Click here to see what's going on at the N.C. Museum of Natural Sciences Groundhog Day Celebration.

Mike Huckabee is a Racist Who Eats Squirrels

The squirrel-eating I can forgive. Here's to Christopher Hitchens for telling it like it is.

American Gladiators are weaklings

They wouldn't stand a chance against Japanese treadmill racers. (I, on the other hand, could give them a run for their yen with my lightning-swift paws and hurdling prowess.) Witness their extraordinary feats at YouTube.

On the heels of the Japanese in stamina is this fierce rodent competitor.